There is no half singing in the shower, you're either a rock star or an opera singer ~ Joseph Groban
I just broke up with someone and the last thing she said to me was "You'll never find anyone like me again!" I'm thinking, "I should hope not! If I don't want you, why would I want someone like you.
I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying. ~ Oscar Wilde
Don't drink and drive - you might hit a bump and spill it. ~ Murphy's Law
Virtue is insufficient temptation. ~ George Bernard Shaw
Men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all the other alternatives. ~ Abba Eban
If women didn't exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning. ~ Aristotle
Attention to health is life greatest hindrance. ~ Plato
Alcohol - the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems. ~ Homer Simpson
Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes. ~ Jim Carrey
Cleanliness becomes more important when godliness is unlikely. ~ P. J. O'Rourke
Life is like a sewer... what you get out of it depends on what you put into it. ~ Tom Lehrer
The only fool bigger than the person who knows it all is the person who argues with him. ~ Stanislaw Jerszy Lec
Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television. ~ Woody Allen
Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act. ~ Truman Capote
I just broke up with someone and the last thing she said to me was "You'll never find anyone like me again!" I'm thinking, "I should hope not! If I don't want you, why would I want someone like you.
I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying. ~ Oscar Wilde
Don't drink and drive - you might hit a bump and spill it. ~ Murphy's Law
Virtue is insufficient temptation. ~ George Bernard Shaw
Men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all the other alternatives. ~ Abba Eban
If women didn't exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning. ~ Aristotle
Attention to health is life greatest hindrance. ~ Plato
Alcohol - the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems. ~ Homer Simpson
Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes. ~ Jim Carrey
Cleanliness becomes more important when godliness is unlikely. ~ P. J. O'Rourke
Life is like a sewer... what you get out of it depends on what you put into it. ~ Tom Lehrer
The only fool bigger than the person who knows it all is the person who argues with him. ~ Stanislaw Jerszy Lec
Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television. ~ Woody Allen
Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act. ~ Truman Capote
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